Working in a call center can be hellish. I know this from experience.
But calling into a call center can be a damn frustrating experience, too. In case you missed yesterday’s post, I spent hours on the phone with Comcast trying to fix an issue with my internet connection.
My nerves were tightly wound to begin with, but everything got worse when the first representative transferred me to a dead line that suddenly ended our call after about 45 minutes.
Insert rageface here.
So, when I called back, of course I had to re-input all of my account information and wait through the standard IVR message about pressing 6 if I want to order some kind of live wrestling event on cable.
No, I do not want to watch wrestling for a fee. No, I do not want to watch wrestling at all.
I just want my internet back, people. So I can work and make money to pay my bills and stuff.
FOLLOW THE SCRIPT
I tried hard to avoid letting my frustration get the best of me when the new CSR (let’s call him Alex) came on the line. Most first-level CSRs aren’t paid enough, in my opinion, to deal with jaw-clenching, white-knuckle customers with huge knots in their chests.
So, I tried to be kind.
“Hi, Alex. I don’t want to bother you with my problems so I need a supervisor right away. I was just on the phone with a rep for an hour, and he didn’t resolve my problem, and we got disconnected.”
“I can help you with that, Ma’am,” he said. I think they HAVE to say that sort of thing as a way to slyly prevent us callers from being immediately transferred to a supervisor.
After he took my account information again, and spent 10 minutes waiting for my account to “come up”, he began the same standard troubleshooting process that Barry had taken me through. Is your modem on? Can you power cycle it? Hmm, I can’t find your modem. What about your router? Can you reset your router?
(At this point, I felt my heart start to race both from the stress of the call and the fact that, if I were to panic, I wouldn’t be able to contact my husband for moral support because I was already on the phone. On a phone call that I was too invested in to consider disconnecting.)
“No, Alex. I’m sorry. I don’t want to go through this again. Can I speak with your supervisor?”
FOLLOW THE LEADER
He promptly transferred me to a supervisor named Solomon, who was actually quite a nice guy. Of course, we had to go through the same stuff all over again: Is your modem on? Can you power cycle it? Hmm, I can’t find your modem. What about your router? Can you reset your router?
Yes, yes, okay, yes, yes. Oh geez, so many questions. So much breath.
Then, the woozy head.
And then, in response to the woozy head, the shakes. I reached for the Xanax — I felt, frankly, it was the only way to placate myself. Hanging up wasn’t an option. Sure, it would help to soothe my nerves — temporarily — but it would also undo any progress I’d made with the Comcast rep. (Did I make progress with the Comcast rep?)
It reminded me of having a panic attack at the grocery store — if you leave your cart and run away, you’ll have to return to the store eventually or you’ll have nothing to eat.
Except here, instead of a cart of food, it was a tenuous, delicate connection to a guy who may or may not be able to solve my problems. I felt trapped between the grocery store aisles and I wasn’t anywhere near grocery store aisles. I was in my house, on the floor, cuddling up with my router.
Oh, nervous system. You slay me.
(And there’s still more to come tomorrow.)
Photo: Splityarn (Flickr)